The Category of Friends

The surprising thing that I noticed about myself is how long I take to accept someone as a friend. I don't know why but my definition of friendship is a very narrow one. I usually don't count someone as a friend unless I concluded that I am truly connected with that person at emotionally and that person is like-minded enough.  Both of these criterions are often difficult to meet. Sometimes I spent days, weeks and months with people without accepting them as friends. Meanwhile, in my heart these people remain strangers. Even though,  I walk, talk and eat with them regularly.
             These categories of friends and strangers are not trivial one, they come with their own consequences . These categories determine how intensely I would connect with people, how much I would allow them to know myself and how much I would  expect from them.  Usually, I found very few people worthy of the label of "friend". Mostly, I put people in the box of 'strangers' which implies that I will never bother to spent much time with them, niether I would troubled much in distancing myself from them.
            The problem I am experiencing  now is that I only have two boxes I also need another box and I think that could be of acquaintances.  I think my definition of friendship is too narrow and leave little space for people who are not closely attached with me, and would never going to be . Therefore, I should loosen my definition of friends a little bit. Or,  create another category for those with whom I can only relate with in rather loose manner.
            At the moment , my understanding of friendship leaves space for only three to four people at a time. These are the people who form the core of my 'inner circle'. Being part of this circle means that I enjoy continuous proximity with these people and won't be afraid of opening up my heart before them at any moment. Where 'inner circle' includes people with whom I once enjoyed same level emotional proximity but it's not true anymore.
           Unfortunately, the sensation of emotional proximity with someone is a fragile one and whenever someone from the core of my inner circle moves away for a good enough amount of time I found myself unable to recognize him or her at emotional level again. And,  that person become very much stranger for me. This is the one reason that I have so few friends, my definition of 'friends' only offer a space for 'few' people.